back like a tarnished coin

:) Writing about myself is perhaps my most favoured pastime but somehow I haven't been giving myself to pleasure of doing so, off late especially.
Given, we had some decent days over the last 6months that I have been away (or has it been more?)
either ways, I feel the need to voice my thoughts into space, be it virtual so well, here's for starters
I sat through two films Bridges of Madison and Atonement, both about love...
The commonality comes from finding love and even having it reciprocated but never celebrating the joy of togetherness.
What an awful thought to live life with? Knowing there is someone who loves you as much as you love them, but never finding the strength or the opportunity to reach out... to comfort and be comforted?
It has been disturbing me for a while now....

another disturbing thought, when Clint Eastwood said 'this kind of certainty comes just once in a lifetime'
it scared me!!!
Most of us live our lives without feeling emotions of that magnitude!

People can call me what they want, they might think I want to live in fairytales but in my head, I just don't wish to give up on love!

more randomness and movies....

For a very long time I had The Reader, tucked away in one of the CDs at home, somehow wasn’t really in the frame of mind to want to watch something which would be heavy on the heart.

Today while waiting for pages to proofread I ran through the film, actually sat peacefully and enjoyed every bit of it, given the fact that we have the issue packed up and waiting to reach the stands and not too many people had shown up today. I liked the film….

Actually, human behaviour in itself is such a compelling subject that somehow, it always conjures up fantastic stories. Just why we do what we do is so intriguing for one and all. Like in the case of Hanna Schmit…
(I am not the greatest fan of Kate Winslet and through the initial 15mins of the film I was pretty unhappy with the way that kid looked too… but then again, you don’t really go wowie, and totally glued to a film from the word go, it has to grow on you.)

There are many times when I look back in life, I wonder what if I had done things differently. I don’t really know if my life would have been much different cause I haven’t been on too many crossroads or maybe I just didn’t stop to ponder ever, when maybe I should have, I’d never know!

Another thing, the whole jazz about ‘guilt’!

Through out the film I kept thinking of how did the Kid ever manage to get over the guilt of keeping mum, about not going through those gates and walking up to Hanna the first time he attempted. For someone like me who just needs reasons to worry my heart out, it is too much pain to deal with. I don’t know why I do that so very many times; I pick out a person from the yore and think of all the days that we have shared, many a times it adds up to nothing more than 2 or 3… and then think of an instance where perhaps I tried telling a joke that might have hurt the person, or even a snide comment (I used to be super sarcastic to the world at one pointt; I am now working against it) and then feel miserable about the whole thought. In all probability, I might be the only one of the two who has even bothered to remember the instance yet, I succeed in making myself miserable about it.

Like this one recurring thought: About a professor of ours, I have always been obedient and respectful of others but this one time, a classmate pointed out to me how this particular professor might be really dirty, for he wears the same clothes all the time… The thought of person not changing clothes, equated to lack of civic sense in my head, I couldn’t think of any other reasons why someone wont change clothes and would feel very disgusted if I had to go past him, till somehow I heard he wasn’t financially well off and was working very hard to support the family… that guilt still stays with me, though with it also comes the pray of hope, that wherever he might be, he should be doing good today!

Procrastinating sucks!

Sat seeing UNDER THE TUSCAN SUN. I had received great reviews from a friend but frankly it wasn’t something out of the world though I enjoyed it in parts. For the longest time now, I have been in the mood to watch some good stuff, something that’s simple yet sweet (kinda like me *takes a bow*) I did manage to see one a few months ago called A SHOP AROUND THE CORNER and was pleasantly surprise but none after that….

In fact, off late I haven’t really seen many movies (I am a total movie buff, nothing out of the ordinary, even regular boy meets girl movies go wonderfully with me!) not because of the strike, that has never stopped me but just generally hasn’t happened. It’s perhaps the longest interlude between two films so far! Guess the work was hectic or the ambience wasn’t just right. Which is altogether too surprising since recently, on my husband’s insistence and persistence and dedication (he worked very hard for this one) we managed to treat ourselves with a television set.

It was a little expensive venture but since we both love watching movies and always dreamt of that big screen thinggie at the comfort of our own house, we thought we could push ourselves just a lil bit more and get that plasma TV we’ve so been wanting.

The TV is now coupla weeks old but we haven’t seen a single film. Leave aside a film; we didn’t even get through one episode of F.R.I.E.N.D.S. (no surprise we have the entire collection) we started it, I think twice and just never got around seeing it.

Such is life, you slog and you slog thinking there’d be a time to enjoy it all, and time? Well it just keeps slipping away!